Vulnerability and a Life of Passion

In Brené Brown's TED Talk, "The power of vulnerability," she describes how the people who find life fulfilling have to embrace the idea of feeling uncomfortable, of being uncompromisingly who they are, and being proud of it. Only then can people live lives full of passion and connection.

Last Friday, David Brooks touched on this topic in his article, "Lady Gaga and the Life of Passion." Reflecting on Gaga's reflection that she has always wanted to be brave and passionate, Brooks examines what makes someone live whole-heartedly. He says, "I suppose that people who live with passion start out with an especially intense desire to complete themselves...We have to bring ourselves to fulfillment, to integration and to coherence." But, in order to do this, we have to open ourselves up to being comfortable with where we are. We have to be open to exploration and we have to decide not to settle for anything less than what we want.

In our culture, we teach children that they should have an answer ready for what they want to be when they grow up as young as elementary school. On Halloween each year you can usually find a few kids in helmets or lab coats who will enthusiastically tell you that they want to be a doctor, a scientist, a construction worker, or a firefighter. While we do not put much emphasis on their answers (they are only eight years old, after all), there is still an expectation that we should know what we want to do and where we want to go in the future.

As I have mentioned in previous posts, I am undecided about what I ultimately want to study at Penn State. I often find it really frustrating to be in this position because so many of my peers have their lives mapped out from now to post-graduation. But, I also know that I do not feel ready to pick a major. I need to embrace the fact that I don't know where I'm going or what I'm doing.

Both Brooks and Brown argue that you need to have courage and embrace vulnerability to lead a fulfilling life. As Brooks says, "We all care what others think about us. People with passion are just less willing to be ruled by the tyranny of public opinion." After we break out of society's expectations of us, we will find that we have more freedom to be who we want to be.

At an event, I recently heard a speaker describe a very easy, but important exercise that can help you really reflect on why you do what you do. Take a piece of paper and write down everything that you have participated in or spent time on (include things you do now). Then write the reasons you do each one. We all do things because we know they look good for employers or because we know they would make our parents happy. But challenge yourself to only do the things you enjoy.

Brooks ends his article on a powerful note asking, "Who would you be and what would you do if you weren’t afraid?" I challenge all of you to find this out.